Thank you so far.
It was a short sentence, but what it contained was clear. I threw the letter in the trash. Another conclusion was made.
No, can you say the conclusion? It wasn’t a good relationship from the beginning. Impulsive relationships formed through unexpected events. There is no responsibility to link them.
Now everything in me was on my way to the top.
To spur the hike, I picked up the toaster occupying one of the shelves, brought a box, and carefully tucked it in so as not to damage it. Then, I sealed it tightly with tape to prevent it from leaking, and checked once again to see if there were any problems.
Afterwards, I felt a blunt touch on my feet as I headed towards the veranda to get another box. It was a 10,000-won bill that had been folded into a scab-like shape.
I don’t spend cash. I don’t know much more about bills that look like rags torn apart and crumpled. There’s only one person who can drop this.
But I didn’t want to worry too much. It’s impossible to open the boxes that have already been packed and piled up on the front door. Rather, the guy himself would be hoping for it. I didn’t know what was going to happen.
I continued packing the box. And when I finished packing the 4th box, I went outside with a bill.
It was because it was difficult to hold back the passionate anger that erupted from his throat.
Take it with you, as if there was no existence from the beginning, you will take every trace of you and throw it away yourself.
The light leaking from the house surrounds the alleyway covered with afterglow.
where are you, where are you going Are you disappearing into the darkness of another alleyway? Are you going to run away like that, throwing irreplaceable garbage in the corner of my heart?
What used to be a step while walking down the alley turns into a slow step, and then changes to a sprint.
so run the night
However, it was dangerous to run through the streets at night without a clear sense of purpose and using the primal impulse as a milestone.
The rapid breathing and narrowing of the field of vision ate the reason, and the stone beak protruding between them dug into it. I lost my focus and fell.
The bitter taste of iron lingers in your mouth. Unpleasant pain from the shriveled knee and swept palms cools his burning head. Now I was thinking more soberly than ever.
What are you doing now?
A familiar voice echoes in my head. Maybe it’s my voice, maybe it’s my parents’ voice, maybe it’s Chae Seol-ha’s voice, or it’s like the voice of a woman who remains hazy in my memory. It was difficult to clearly define its identity.
I’m going to return the money to the guy.
You bastard, you can see that. That’s not what I’m asking. You’re asking why.
to remove stains. Otherwise, it will come to mind again someday. When I saw money rolling on the floor while cleaning, I was like, ‘Oh, yes, there was one like that.’ ‘Cause I’ll do it
What’s wrong with that?
It’s a problem. that’s a huge problem. He’s trying to mock me like that. you are nothing He said he was an idiot who couldn’t do anything and couldn’t change anything.
So you run out of the house in the middle of the night? Run like a drunken madman and break your knee? Don’t you think it’s embarrassing?
but.
Man, if you want to erase the traces, burn the bills. If the ashes are removed, who knows what was there? Why would you leave the easy way and go far away? So what if you get caught by the police? Can you excuse a grown man chasing after a high school girl?
… … no.
go back at once Take a deep breath and think again. you’re so excited right now When you sleep, eat, and drink, bills are bound to fly somewhere.
I had no choice but to nod my head at the unreasonable remark. It certainly wasn’t crazy. Thinking in an insane state is usually useless and inconsistent. The cold, cold water runs down your back and all over your body.
That was the moment when I came to my senses and decided to go home.
Suddenly, the sound of footsteps echoes from right next to you. The squishy and squishy sound that came from a distance as if I could reach it at any moment with my outstretched hand was a very sad thing for me.
wanna catch it? You might be surprised if you catch it all of a sudden. you might hate it Then what if I get a report? No, it could be an injured animal, not a human. Even then, it would hurt if bitten or scratched. thoughts go on Meanwhile, the footsteps had long since disappeared.
The only thing I could catch in my hand as I raised my head belatedly was the intangible wind that flew through my fingers.
When you touch the floor, it feels crunchy to the touch and stings your palms. Dangling claws hold onto his legs, telling him not to do that. The creaking knee screams that it can’t be done. Everyone ignored it and got up. And then ran away.
A relationship free of lies and deceit, the right ending to move forward, the end of the relationship, the truth, a walk to the top, what you want to look good at, a complete understanding of yourself and others, a normal, peaceful daily life without pain.
They are similar to what I have hoped for so far, but they are only similar in appearance to the last, and they can never satisfy me. It must be attesting to the emptiness in my hand right now.
Actually, I wanted to hold your hand. I wanted to hold her hand as she staggered and precariously advanced. Stronger, stronger than ever.
And then I wanted to say I love you again. It was a relationship that had only been hidden up until now, so I wanted to convince her until the very end by listing my strengths, even if it looked ugly.
In the end, I just wanted to shout. After clearly telling others what I wanted, I wanted to grab it with both hands.
But the negative experiences of the past blinded me. Even though he was buried in the past and was in a different situation after that, he was busy making excuses and running away. I couldn’t convince others. The responsibility to take on by going deep was burdensome. I hated seeing the spear pointed at me when the relationship broke down.
So, consider the risk. Assess the feasibility of implementation. gain, causality, probabilities, correctness. I’ve calculated everything I can think of in advance.
The same goes for midsummer. It is a fact that anyone can tell that the place he is heading to is not his home. I don’t know for sure, but at least it’s definitely not a warm place.
He will starve again, and he will go to sleep in a scruffy bathroom, and in the process he may be subjected to atrocities that he cannot even speak of.
Of course, I can’t solve the midsummer’s problem. I don’t know what to do and I don’t know what to do. Even if you can, that’s not my business. If a stranger other than the parents tried to do it, it would only constitute a criminal act. That’s not the right way.
But does following the right path make me happy? Can I go to bed with a comfortable feeling under the blanket?
No, no. His rotten pearly eyes will continue to hover around me, popping out at unexpected moments and making my heart flutter. Because meeting people is like that.
If so, grab it.
After thinking about it, it was already too late. Even if you regret, nothing will not come back.
It is not too late to think about trivial things like reasons, feasibility and humiliation caused by the act of persuasion, and the fear of rejection. It doesn’t matter what you put it in.
First of all, grab it.
“midsummer.”
I grabbed my slender forearms that shimmered in front of me and opened my mouth. His shoulders bouncing and bouncing were visually conveying his emotions.
Now, what should I do? What do I have to say, what do I want to say to him more than that?
Facing the problems I had been putting off gave me a headache. But it did. I’ll be willing to bear the headache.
I’m sick of finishing it without even starting it.
* * *
As usual, a question suddenly popped up in Midsummer’s mind as she squatted down on the toilet as an excuse to be constipated and read a novel secretly.
‘Isn’t it all the same story after all?’
Although they may differ in the details such as times, backgrounds, characters, and events, in the end, all literature is a story about reward. Wars between nations, conflicts between humans, and environmental destruction are all conflicts that would not have occurred if they had been given back as much as they had received.
The same goes for Adam and Eve. If they hadn’t been more greedy than they had been given, he would have been lying on the lawn of Eden instead of the musty-smelling toilet.
Midsummer seemed to have learned what the ‘benevolent life’ was, which was emphasized by her parents to make them sting their ears. If my father hadn’t forbid reading non-Bible books, I would have realized it a little sooner. Some parts of the Bible were boring or difficult to understand.
Midsummer sighed in disappointment, but at the same time, he felt better because he felt that he had become a very meaningful being. Yes, I am a being sent down by God to realize the value of boeun on this earth. What?
Read at nobelmtl.com
Midsummer felt very funny to see herself having an absurd delusion. I can’t help it even if I lose my mind from reading a book in the smelly bathroom every night. A self-deprecating smile comes out of his lips.
Still, isn’t that better than thinking that you were born to serve as your parents’ punching bag?
So, I worked hard in the midsummer. If I received something, I tried to reciprocate it, and even if I did not receive anything, I approached and gave it first.
In order to repay the kindness of his parents who made him born on this earth, he did whatever he asked of him to do. Even the medium was trying to understand. Every night I prayed to God with a grateful heart. No matter how hard it is If I try, everyone will find out someday. I was born for that.
But there was no reward for that heart. The bans increased and the beatings did not stop.
They were always asking for more. Of course, there are people who don’t. Somewhere in this world, there must be people with a heart that knows how to reciprocate.
However, the only ones standing by midsummer were the piglets grunting with greed with their mouths wide open.
Ironically, the pigs want to feel the satisfaction that comes from giving. That’s why they pretend to be good-looking, preach a sermon in the name of advice to others, mumble only shells, and throw karate checks that they can’t take responsibility for.
When she realized such a fact, Midsummer could not hold back the rising anger and fell to the ground. If I could, I wanted to beat the ground hard and cry.
