Chapter 74 – Tears Melted Into Scars (2)
Buya and me too. It seems like I took a day off and went to sleep. When I woke up in the morning, all three of them were so tangled together that it could be said that they were all in the same bed.
Even in the middle of a daze, I put my hand on Haru’s forehead first. I felt some heat, but I couldn’t tell if I had a fever or if it was just my hands being cold.
“Whoa…”
Tired. For several days, that one emotion dominated me. It’s such a big disaster that you can’t shake off your fatigue even after waking up. I had no idea when this time of suffering would end.
In the meantime, Saya was also leaning on the bed, soaked in fatigue. Seeing the shadows forming around her eyes, she felt her troubled heart sink even more. She gently stroked her cheek, and Saya instinctively rubbed her face against it.
Soft. But it also seems a little bit rough. I caressed her cheek a little more, then looked away.
Then, I met Rebecca’s eyes as she was staring at me.
I don’t know how long I’ve been here. As soon as she saw me, she stretched her mouth and opened her mouth in a grating voice.
“You’re up. Lope.”
“Miss Rebecca.”
“Hatchlings have been crying all night. I guess there are still a few around here.”
“What about the numbers?”
“At least five. No, maybe six. It’s clear that it’s a difficult number to deal with.”
“I need to get out of here quickly.”
“Yes. I have to go.”
It was such a natural thing that our conversation flowed smoothly. But there was one fatal element that was missing.
So where do I go now
It couldn’t have ended if the conclusion wasn’t met.
“Then let’s look at the map. Do you still have it, Rebecca?”
“Why are you looking for a map?”
“That’s because we’ll have to decide where to go next.”
“…Wasn’t that decided?”
The voice that had been hushed up suddenly twisted sharply. But she soon shut her mouth and took her map out of her arms and held it. Looking at the abbreviated view of the unfolding world once again, I was lost in thought.
“That’s where we are now.”
“Okay.”
“The route Rebecca suggested goes through this village here.”
“Yes.”
“But if that happens, we’ll have to go back quite a bit to the port. The risk will be great.”
It was clearly a horse with thorns inside. Rebecca must have felt it too, but she hadn’t shown herself yet.
“It’s a risk. What does that mean? If you don’t pass through the village, you’ll have to cross the plains with no cover again. I think that would be even more dangerous.”
“You know from experience. It doesn’t matter whether you have cover or not in front of the dragon. Whether you go through a village or across a plain. It won’t make much of a difference unless you go through the sea. So it’s better to take the shorter route.”
“Wouldn’t it be better to go through the village and pick up supplies?”
“I already have enough food. It’s not that far from the port, so I don’t need to pack more shoes. Rather, the key is to arrive quickly before the day’s conditions deteriorate.”
“But…”
She opened her mouth to refute to the end. But I nailed it first before that.
“Besides, if you’re going to avoid hatchlings, it’s much more dangerous near the village.”
“Why is that?”
“Because hetzlings will need food. Of course they will head to places with living things. Or at least to places with human food. It’s only natural that their attention will be directed towards the village.”
“It’s not necessarily so. There’s a possibility that the town is completely empty.”
“So Rebecca-san doesn’t have any reason to go to the village anymore?”
“…”
If the village is completely empty, that means your son is gone. Rebecca, who was at odds with herself, finally shut her mouth. But he couldn’t quite understand it. He couldn’t help it, so he couldn’t help but nod his head.
So he finally asked me a question in a very heavy voice.
“So what do you want to say?”
“That…”
…
But at that moment, I couldn’t even speak clearly. In the end, I guess I couldn’t become a heartless human being until the end.
No, rather, it was because what Rebecca had done for us in the meantime was placed on his heart. Whatever her intentions, whatever her purpose, she devoted herself to us. Her shoulders have been broken to protect children who are not of her blood.
Not just rhetorically, Rebecca’s shoulder was really broken. She tried hard to hide it, but she caught a glimpse of missing screws and cracks in places. No matter how much she hid herself in the steel, it seemed clear that her time was running out.
And it couldn’t be simply dismissed as an adult’s duty. So she couldn’t help but drop her mouth.
In the end, I couldn’t say what I had to say and brought up another story.
“Miss Rebecca.”
“What’s wrong, Lope.”
“How far is the village where your son lives?”
“That…”
Scruple. Guilty. And hope. Just as all colors become black when mixed, the messy, tangled emotions also turned gray. She pondered for a long time on what to say before finally opening her mouth.
“If you walk, it will take one to two days. It will probably take two days. You’ll have to approach carefully.”
“What if I ride a horse?”
“One day should be enough.”
“A day?”
“If you run on your own. It’s just a home.”
I was cautious. Not knowing what result each word would bring, a path of thorns lay beneath her feet. I looked at her like that and asked her a crucial question.
“Are you sure you have a son?”
“…”
“Miss Rebecca?”
“…Yeah. I’m sure.”
Contemplating her, she raised her head and met her eyes with her face. But there was another hesitation.
“But Lope.”
“Yes.”
“I am…”
The hesitation did not end, dangling dangling at the end of parted lips. In the end, even Rebecca couldn’t be a complete villain. She let out a thin sigh and touched her fingers without her words.
A piece of her metal fell from the tip of her finger as she rubbed so meaninglessly. With blood. With oil. A piece of steel covered with moisture. As I lifted it into the air, it glowed crimson in the morning sunlight. It was her shards from a crumbling world.
Rebecca stared intently at the piece of metal. Then she took out words that she didn’t know what they meant.
“Lope. I think we’ve come too far.”
“I see.”
“I didn’t expect it to come this far.”
“Are you saying that now?”
“It’s just because I have a new feeling. Where is this place, Lope?”
“I don’t know the name…Isn’t it the academy?”
“This is where my son used to go.”
With a bang, another piece fell to the floor. Mr. Rebecca cradled her shattering hand in her arms and she continued her speech.
“I could have been a security guard here. But I gave up right before the contract. I was afraid that my presence would disturb my son.”
“…”
“As you know, there are bound to be naughty children at the academy. What if they see my prosthetic arm and tease or harass my son?
“It can’t be.”
“I know. But I was scared. So I couldn’t be around Aiden.”
“Aiden…”
“Yes. Aiden. That’s my son’s name.”
Only then did Rebecca raise her head. Then he said, dropping his hand, which had only held his hawk, to the floor.
“You said you never saw me on vacation on the island. Actually, you’re right. I was too scared to go see Aiden now, so I didn’t. I happened to end up near it by chance, but I saw her from afar and then ran away. .”
“As expected.”
“I’m sorry I lied to you, but we’ve come too far to run away any longer. We’re running out of time. So I think I can say it for sure now, Lope.”
“Yes.”
“I will definitely go to my son.”
“…”
“And I will do my best for him.”
Something I wanted to say for a long time. And that was the one thing I should have said now. Rebecca looked at me with a very hardened expression and said,
“Perhaps this will never change.”
I carefully carried the day on my back. Haru sternly refused, but no matter how much I thought about it, it seemed that I was not in a state where I could walk alone. Besides, it’s not that heavy, so I thought it wouldn’t be a burden.
However, once I carried it on my back, it did not feel light. Carrying someone else’s weight couldn’t be that simple in the first place.
In fact, it was anything. Whether that’s life whether love or death.
If you’re trying to carry it, it’s bound to be overwhelming.
“Hey. It’s hard to carry this because it only has one arm. Forgive me if I tighten it a little bit, senpai. It’s because I thought it would fall off if I didn’t.”
“If I had known it would be like this, I would have brought swaddling clothes.”
“That’s a good idea. Shall we go get one right now?”
“There’s nowhere to get it anyway.”
“There might be one or two at Rebecca’s house, right?”
Haru started talking cheerfully as always. But no one could easily answer. Saya just silently stroked Haru’s back, and Rebecca didn’t even look this way.
Then Haru hugged my neck tighter. I felt a greater weight as I walked down the stairs.
“Or I’ll make one. Well, there won’t be much use for it anyway.”
“How long are you going to stay on your back?”
“No, it’s not like you can pass it on when your senior has a baby. Isn’t that right, Saya unnie?”
“…”
“No… Elves don’t have to use those things. They’ll cling to their backs like cicadas. But what happens when a half-elf gives birth to a human again? Half-half-elf?”
“…”
“It wasn’t funny. I’m sorry, sister. But no matter how much I am, I can’t always be funny.”
As the silence continued, Haru’s arms wrapped around him more deeply. Underneath her feigned cheerfulness was a palpable anxiety. I felt as if the body temperature I had leaned against in the cold atmosphere was gradually cooling down.
Suddenly, I felt a sense of deja vu. It seemed that I had been through a similar situation when I came out of the island.
Back then, Saya was clinging to me. It wasn’t upside down, but other than that, everything was the same. I received irreparable wounds, felt a sense of loss, and felt as if I would crumble without me.
…
Heavy. Their existence becomes heavier and heavier.
“Well, anyway, then I’ll have to walk today, won’t I?”
“I guess so.”
“I can’t help it, then. I’ll wait an hour or two and then go down. I don’t want to be carried like luggage.”
“It’s okay if you stay on your back.”
“No. Then Saya unnie is jealous. It’s not like Saya unnie…”
“Rope.”
Then, suddenly, Saya turned her head towards me. Then she asked me in a calm voice.
“Where are you going now?”
“…”
I just raised my head. A sudden cold wind blew her long hair to pieces. The sunlight, which had cooled down before I knew it, leaked into my eyes, and I felt like tears were about to flow.
But there was already a long way to go to cry. Rebecca regretted the path she had passed, but I had to despair thinking of the path I had to take. At first glance, the story looked similar, but it couldn’t be the same at all.
That’s why I didn’t answer Saya’s words. Instead, I called someone else’s name.
“Miss Rebecca.”
“Huh?”
“Thank you.”
I turned her head towards her. Then, calmly, she continued to speak.
“It feels new to tell you now. Anyway, it’s all thanks to Rebecca that I’ve been able to come this far. Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to get out of the island.”
“You don’t have to, Lope.”
“But it’s true. It was Rebecca who gave me the direction and led the way. I’m sorry for telling you so late. Thank you, Rebecca.”
“Because I don’t have to…”
“I just want to do it, Captain.”
At the nostalgic name, she shut her mouth. But I didn’t stop and kept pouring out the story.
“Even though there was no reason to do so, the captain gave his whole body for us. It’s an adult’s duty. It’s a responsibility. You can add various reasons, but it’s actually pure goodwill. Even if I think about it several times, I feel very sorry.”
“No.”
“In a way, it’s as if I’ve been restraining you up until now. The captain has things to do and people to protect. It’s too late to realize now. But it’s better than not realizing it forever.”
“…”
“There will be no way to repay this grace in the rest of my life. I’m sure there will be. If that’s the case, I should at least try not to commit any more sins. Fortunately, there is a turning point where I can do that, so I decided to try even now.”
“Rope…”
“So, I’ll let you go now, Captain.”
The last word fell lightly like a leaf blown by the wind. I moved my steps with Haru on my back and stood by Saya. Then, looking straight into Captain Rebecca’s eyes, I handed over her last words.
“Now we. Let’s go our separate ways.”
