40. Leading, leading (5)
“Who… Do you?”
Elijah lost her mind.
I was paralyzed in front of the shock that far exceeded my expectations.
Her breathing and heart, which had been trembling until just now, calmly subsided as if they had stopped.
Blinking blankly at her eyes.
She wanted to cry sadly, but for some reason, her crying didn’t stop.
It just lacked a sense of reality.
All of this.
“My condition is a bit….”
Judas tried to say that she couldn’t see her eyes and ears, but cut her off.
Because she had been in suspended animation for two days, her throat hurt whenever she spoke.
Elijah interpreted his words and expressions differently.
Memory loss due to coming back from death.
I was afraid and wanted to run away.
He doesn’t know himself very far in this situation.
At the same time, I was relieved.
I don’t know exactly what the principle is.
Just to be sure, he was revived.
With that, I was relieved and satisfied.
“I am yes….”
Elijah, who was about to answer, suddenly shut her mouth.
‘I am yes… what?’
The target you served.
Yes master.
Really, is that all?
Can you be satisfied with that answer?
No. Not satisfied
Maybe in this place, we can start anew and become a different relationship.
I even heard such an evil heart.
In her moment, disgusted with her own desires, Elijah wanted to strangle her.
She didn’t say anything to Judas’ question.
Meanwhile, Judas was puzzled.
‘Why didn’t I say something?’
It’s just that you can’t identify it, but it’s enough to recognize that the other person is making a sound.
‘I just didn’t answer, am I mistaken? I can’t even hear it properly, but my eyes are like this, so I’m frustrated and going crazy….’
Even in a state of suspended animation, bodily functions stop once.
Of course it won’t be easy to recover again, but I didn’t expect it to be to this extent.
Anyway, it seems certain that the other person stayed by her side until she woke up.
I had to say hello.
She cleared her sore throat again.
“I don’t know who you are, but thank you for your help.”
In my mind, I wanted to ask how many days have passed, what happened to Jericho and Gigantic Drake, and various stories.
But even if she answered, she couldn’t hear herself, so she decided not to ask.
“You must be busy, but it’s okay to go.”
Actually, it’s not okay.
I’m barely able to speak, and I don’t have the energy to get out of bed.
That said, I couldn’t ask someone I didn’t know to stay because I needed help.
She suddenly worried that this might be an unfamiliar and dangerous place, but she didn’t think that would be the case if she was the one who stood by her side.
‘Why is there no response? … Is it someone I know?’
Belatedly, I felt that way.
There is a high probability that it is someone you know who will take care of you after you have collapsed.
There are a few people in Jericho that deserve that.
‘Euridike and Orphe…. Or four former training camp candidates….’
Perhaps it’s a guard commander or a mercenary office worker that I’ve made friends with while working.
‘But that…. I don’t think so.’
From the perception of her opponent’s presence, Judas felt something leading her.
That something flowed from the opponent in front.
Though he couldn’t see or hear it, he felt that the other person was as warm as the sun.
It was different from simply feeling the body temperature.
I even had the rude thought of wanting to touch it for a moment.
Among the people I’ve been with, there’s no such person, so the subject is probably a first-time acquaintance.
“Hey…. Are you okay?”
“… Ah.”
Judah asked again.
Only then did Elijah regain her sanity.
She was lost for a while.
The words of Judas to himself.
That tone.
The gaze and attitude towards strangers.
Elijah’s instincts separated her consciousness from reality for a moment.
I don’t want to see that reality.
However, it is impossible not to face her forever.
What did Judas say?
Ah. It’s okay to go.
She’s saying she doesn’t need him.
It felt like a stone was sitting in her heart.
It’s frustrating, and it hurts heavily.
I feel this way when I say be considerate.
How did Judas feel when she heard her own words to go out and die?
She dared not even guess.
She didn’t want to leave.
This world felt absurd for a moment.
What she wants is right in front of her, so why should she get out of here?
I couldn’t understand.
“I….”
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Elijah decided to change her words.
“Me.”
Even though she thought it was a bad thing.
“I’m just an ordinary wizard. I’m here to take care of you, so you can rest in peace.”
Why should an ordinary wizard take care of an injured person?
She realized it after she said it was strange, but she couldn’t handle it.
She waited impatiently for her answer.
Meanwhile, Judas thought.
‘What do you mean… ?’
She
She didn’t understand, but she could guess.
‘I said I could go, but if she insisted on staying, was she the one who came to treat me or take care of me? Or someone sent it.’
Even though I couldn’t understand the language, I wasn’t without information.
The pitch of the voice. Length.
Summarizing all these things, we can come to a rough conclusion.
‘I don’t know who it is, but it looks like someone came to help.’
It was a good thing.
I didn’t even have the strength to lift a hand.
Judas nodded her head and smiled.
“Then thank you…. I’ll take care of you for a while. In fact, I was in a situation where I needed someone else’s help.”
Elijah smiled brightly.
Just a moment ago, her mood had gone downhill, but before she knew it, it rose high into the sky.
“As much as you like.”
Judas understood her opponent’s answer, meaning she understood and lay down again.
She
She said, ‘By the way, she said she was blind and deaf….’
I barely got up, but my body wasn’t normal since earlier.
I wanted to go to sleep.
For her, it was much more difficult than expected to die once and then wake up.
‘I must have said…. If that’s not the case, why would you stay and try to help….’
The reasonable reason came to its own conclusion.
The fainting consciousness reminded me of a person.
‘Elijah…. How are you….’
How many days have passed.
I wondered how Elijah’s war had turned out.
Even though she knew it was nonsense.
And that Elijah was quietly guarding the sleeping Judas.
*
It did not take long before Elijah realized the condition of Judas’ eyes.
The sleeping Judas was awakened by her intense thirst.
“There…. Are you there?”
Her drowsy Elijah raised her head suddenly.
“Yes! I-I am here.”
Judah confirmed the form of procrastination.
“Sorry, some water….”
As soon as the horse ran out, Elijah brought water to drink by teleport.
She realized her mistake while handing over the cup.
She said, ‘You said it was an ordinary wizard, but she uses teleport… ! What if I find it strange?’
But Judas raised her hand as if he didn’t care.
Her hand struggled to find her cup.
The furrowed eyebrows seemed to be searching for something in her.
Even though there is a cup right in front of it.
Only then did Elijah notice her sense of incongruity.
Carefully, she puts the cup in her hand, and she grabs it as if she had barely found it.
He smiled shyly.
“It’s not unusual to be uncomfortable because you can’t see.”
“Ahead… Can’t you see?”
Yuda was about to put the cup to his mouth, but he realized.
He didn’t say it right.
“I don’t know the exact reason, but I can’t see since I woke up. He was better than yesterday, but…. And….”
I was about to say that I couldn’t hear, but he coughed.
I continued to use his neck while it was dry, and it hurt like tearing.
After asking for my understanding, I drank water.
The lukewarm water was the right temperature for drinking.
It felt like water permeating dry land.
As the vocal cords became moist, they felt much better than before.
Easy to breathe.
‘… How far did you say it?’
He returned the cup and explained it.
“Anyway, not only the eyes, but the body is in various uncomfortable situations.”
“… ….”
“How fortunate I am to have someone to help me.”
By the way, wouldn’t the doctor come and check on my condition?
I was curious, but decided not to ask.
An answer that requires specific understanding will come back, but she can’t even understand it in her current state.
Elijah couldn’t be more genuinely glad that she needed him.
‘Snow….’
Since when?
And until when?
‘If you don’t recognize me, then….’
It’s simply because I can’t see.
That might be the reason.
Then what about her own lies?
‘… No, that wouldn’t be it.’
Looking at him answering normally, there seems to be no problem with his hearing.
There is no way he has forgotten his voice.
It was not an arrogant judgment.
I stayed with him for about 5 years.
Since he was commissioned as an escort knight, he has been around all day.
‘It must be true that I can’t remember….’
It didn’t matter anymore.
Remember yourself or not. It was fine.
If only you were alive.
And like this, if only you could see it yourself.
You don’t have to remember.
Maybe it’s a lucky thing for him.
It probably wasn’t a very good memory.
Is this conceit?
In fact, to him, the existence of himself could be a person who doesn’t care whether he remembers it or not.
May be the only one who has special feelings.
I don’t know. What he thought of himself
But one thing’s for sure, I won’t want any more if you’re living like this now.
Elijah brought the councilor right away.
May and Gail.
The two immediately followed the instructions and checked the state of Judas eyesight.
All the while, Judas sat back at the head of his bed and waited.
‘What is it? Why did two people suddenly increase? Are you a doctor?’
Judging from the way they examined their condition, they didn’t seem to be bad people.
So I stayed still.
Instead, I checked the status window after a long time.
‘… What? Did Gigantic Drake die then?’
The name of the attribute that was Leading Moon has been changed.
[Connected months.]
Likewise, the effect has not changed.
‘Mmm…. I’m not sure. Since the moon is said to be fragmented in the Bible, does it mean that it is a kind of completed form? Maybe something like that… ?’
Meanwhile, Elijah asked hastily.
“How is it? Are you really blind?”
“That…. Right now, it seems to be a temporary symptom. It will gradually improve over time.”
While May explained, Gale looked at the other part.
A stab wound in the middle of her chest.
It is completely healed.
“I told you to use your body gently, eh…. Tsk. More than that, to die and come back to life, what the hell happened to this guy’s body… ?”
There was no trauma left on the body.
For some reason, Judas was familiar with the way he treated the patient fairly roughly.
‘Similar to Gail’s old friend.’
Next to her, Elijah was relieved by the certainty that it was temporary.
“Wait a minute…. Thank god….”
It was not a comfortable situation.
She is not because of Judas, but because of her situation.
The head of the anti-imperial coalition.
As a key weapon of war, she was a person who should not be killed leisurely in this place.
In the name of reorganization, the entire force was returned to a defensive state, but it was only for a moment.
She can’t keep up.
It was a heavy responsibility and position.
Looking back, it was.
The position of nobility.
Responsibilities that must be shouldered as much as enjoyed.
Ever since I was young, I have never been able to afford it because I wanted it.
It’s a luxury you never wanted.
She was just an immature child who liked everything when she was with her mother.
And now, she just wanted to be with Judas.
I wanted to ignore the rest.
However, it was impossible to throw away the responsibility once taken.
For the next few days, Elijah reduced his sleep and divided his time.
While Judas is awake, she stands by him, and at night she leads the campaign or goes to war.
She returns around early dawn and barely falls asleep at Judas’s bedside.
Her complexion was haggard, and her eyes were getting darker.
Still, Elijah was happier than before.
It was a satisfying life.
On the first day Judas was about to eat after waking up, he accidentally dropped his spoon.
“Ah….”
Since she can’t see and her bodily sensations are still numb, she made a mistake.
“Sorry. I am….”
To the apologetic Judas, Elijah brought her a new spoon and tried to feed her.
“Ah, no, this far….”
Seeing him displeased, Elijah smiled.
She copied what he said to herself one day.
“Oh, do it.”
Thanks to her hearing being better than before, I was able to follow exactly what she was saying today.
“Hey, I, I have hands too…. This is kinda….”
“Quickly. Ah.”
“… Driving me crazy.”
He opened his mouth countless times as he scratched her head.
Elijah shoved the spoon into her mouth.
She took it and she looked at him and she smiled happily.
Ever since he was young, Judas used to feed himself.
I wondered how Judas felt at that time.
Now I’ll never know.
It was a precarious daily life.
While taking care of her Judas, Elijah took care with all her nerves not to touch her flesh.
I’m afraid it might harm him.
Because of the constant fighting, his coldness grew more desperate day by day, but he endured it.
Actually, Judas hoped that his skin would at least be brushed once.
‘Something…. Hmm…. I’m not sure, but I guess I’ll have to touch it to know.’
A warm attraction.
I wanted to touch you even for a short while.
So Yuda slowly recovered her body.
It got to the point where the person next to her recognized that it was black hair.
Long, wavy black hair.
He resembles Elijah.
But is Elijah the only person in the world with hair like that?
I laughed at myself for saying it was a ridiculous expectation.
Then one day.
Elijah asked.
It was a bit of an out-of-the-box question, but I’ve been curious about it for a long time.
I wonder how much he remembers.
“Before you came here, what were you doing?”
Judas was in a state where her hearing was quite restored. She
She understood the vocabulary in part, but that was enough to cover her whole question.
“It was an escort knight.”
“… If so, you must have served someone.”
“Yes. Then.”
“Then why are you working as a mercenary in a place like this? From what I hear, you sound quite competent.”
Judah glanced at the opponent.
The color of her hair is recognizable, unlike the first time it was like a hazy haze.
And also that she is a small woman.
Now that the voice can be identified to some extent, the voice and tone are like…. She resembles Elijah.
Except for honorifics.
Soon she snorted.
She thinks she wants to be Elijah, so she’s totally misunderstood.
“Well, it’s not that hard to say. You have a lot of questions today.”
“Just. I’m curious. I’ve been here so far, but there are so many things I don’t know.”
Obviously, the two know nothing about each other.
Judas did not even ask her name.
She had her own reasons.
It’s not a story that can’t be said, but Judas approached the conversation with her light heart.
“I was kicked out. He said he didn’t need me. No, it’s more than unnecessary, and it’s a hindrance.”
“… ….”
“You even gave orders to dispatch troops to Bethany. Did you really want me to die….”
The breathing of the person listening to her was weakly shaking.
However, Judas didn’t notice because she was reminiscing about that time.
“What can I do? What the owner wants to do is a knight. Still, she didn’t intend to die there, so she ran away…. She came here.”
“… Aren’t you resentful?”
“Well….”
Resentment.
I would be lying if I said there was none.
Even that was only for a moment.
In the end, all that was left was lamentation mixed with self-reproach.
She said she couldn’t change or achieve anything in the end.
“I didn’t particularly resent it. Objectively, they say it’s because I’m not enough and I’m no longer needed, but I have to accept it.”
“… ….”
Confessing this to someone who doesn’t know her face or name.
You do everything.
Judah was belatedly embarrassed.
Maybe you don’t know who the other person is, so it’s safe to say it.
This is a difficult thing to say to someone who knows you and Elijah.
After a while, the other person spoke again.
“Maybe…. Have you ever wanted to go back or missed something? Its owner… Who was.”
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Why are you asking this?
It should be fun to hear about other people’s circumstances.
It is neither a pleasant answer nor a situation.
Even more so, this woman keeps reminding her of Elijah.
She’s never asked her name before, because sometimes she thinks this woman is Elijah.
She wanted to think so.
With a light sigh, Judas cast her gaze out of her window.
She looked at the dark-haired woman and she didn’t want to answer.
The scenery you see is still hazy and vague.
Density It spreads like a light watercolor.
When the hell is this eye going to recover?
After a moment of silence, he barely opened his mouth.
The answer seemed to be delivered not to the person nearby, but to the owner who could not hear it.
“Always.”
“… ….”
“Always, it was. Ever since I left, not missing a single day.”
“… ….”
“I wonder if even the last moment of running away from Bethany will come. I thought so too. I could go back anytime, if you found me again.”
It is now a thing of the past.
There was a long silence.
Yuda wondered if the answer was too emotional, so she turned to the person next to her.
‘Why are you so quiet…. Embarrassing people.’
Her black hair smudges like ink.
It is still difficult to identify her face.
Judas, who was observing her quietly, flinched at her.
‘… For a moment. Could it be this person?’
