55 – Healing a Broken Heart
I feel like I’m facing a bit, no, a huge problem right now.
I wanted to go back with her, reminding her of her old relationship, her gentle and fresh relationship once again.
But was it impossible for that to happen?
…From the beginning, after that incident, our relationship may have been destined to change forever.
“Helena?”
Even though I gave her the scruff of her neck, she didn’t even move.
He just breathed heavily and moved closer to me.
I couldn’t believe I was sick.
Because he hugged me properly and smiled.
But she didn’t even touch the nape of my neck.
She just rubs her nose and blushes like she’s getting drunk with my scent,
He was just fooling around with a hazy face.
That satisfied her. He didn’t seem to want more.
The woman who was anxious to get more from me was gone.
Once he started sucking her blood, he couldn’t stop, and he kept pushing her bodily fluids and trying to mix her body.
“Elena, haven’t you… Been drinking my blood for a while?”
Clearly she is handing her questions to her.
But for some reason she doesn’t reveal her own will.
She listened. And she understood.
Then he didn’t answer.
That was making me frustrated.
“Helena?”
“Yes, Niel.”
He rubs her face in his hand and wraps it up as if accepting something precious.
“Is the blood okay? The complexion looks really bad.”
“…Well, I think I need a bit.
My mouth is dry and my head is dizzy.
But…”
After stroking her neck once, she grabbed my collar and hugged me.
“This is a place I dare not reach anymore. I…”
The tip of my finger touched my lips, then it fell.
“It suits me here.”
I wanted to say something, but the shade of her eyes made the face look terribly miserable.
And at that moment, as if something deeper and darker lay beneath her face, her heart jumped, and she sat down.
“It must be arrogance and sin to think that I, a hideous and unscrupulous monster, could get all of you.
You who allow me to bleed,
So… Just a little bit.
If you really want to give me permission,
Because even a small drop is fine…”
“Helena?!”
She grabbed my hands and raised me up. Before I could stop her, she knelt down and bowed her head.
Still holding my hand, she whispered in a desperate voice, baring her fangs.
“Wouldn’t it be polite for me to recklessly reject your grace that even I am trying to protect?
With those warm eyes and heart to me who don’t even deserve it, heh, Niel…
I should have been grateful to even receive it – “
Now burying her head in my belly and holding me, she held her breath for a moment, then she let herself go and put her hands on her lap.
“…I will do as you please. I will do as you say, tell me anything.
Because when I make a decision, things always go wrong and ruin,
I’ll do as you say.
The only thing I can do right now is you,
What to do in the future
All as you wish.”
How am I supposed to treat a girl who seems to have completely let go of her everything.
Even if I did what she wanted,
No matter how much she says that what I want for her is what she wants,
Will I be satisfied with the result?
I wanted a reunion, I never thought our relationship would be remade like this.
“Do whatever you want.
It’s okay if you want me to be unhappy. It’s okay if you want to suffer.
Or, like I did, you can use it as you like without caring about me.
Clinging to you, servilely begging forgiveness,
It’s okay to laugh and ridicule…
I’ll do anything if you let me just be by your side.
If you just tell me what you want, I’ll do it –
Ah, I guess this is rude.
I think you might be uncomfortable hearing what I have to say…”
With that last word, she closed her mouth and cast her gaze down.
Looking at her, it’s as if her doll is tying her own thread directly to her hand,
No, it’s not a doll.
It’s like she’s tying her thread directly to her own limbs and giving it to me.
Even if you say you have no regrets,
Every word she said,
I couldn’t help but look at her quietly because it was so obvious that every expression on her face showed her desperateness.
I don’t know where to approach the girl who has a completely broken heart and says she can be satisfied as long as she can be by my side…
I just held her in my arms once more as she seemed like she would collapse completely if I touched her wrongly.
As if holding her hand for the first time, I gently put one of my fingers into her mouth.
“Let’s take care of ourselves first, Elena.”
“…Are you really giving it to me?”
Lick,
And her tongue tickled my fingertips.
And at the same time, her body trembled.
The vibration was so strong that even my body, which was in contact with it, shook with it.
Besides, the texture of the saliva on the tip of her tongue felt like something more… Sticky.
The expression of sticking at all was correct.
“Please. Speak with your own mouth.
Really – after all that,
Are you giving me your blood?”
I couldn’t see her face from my side.
However, what kind of expression she is making when her words tremble a little.
I could imagine how her heart felt as she held my hand tightly and pulled me into her arms.
For fear that I, who is the last string left in her life, will push her away,
Now that everything about her is at stake, I fear that I will reject her.
I didn’t know how great the fear would be.
But if this can be an opportunity to continue our relationship once again,
If only the kindness I showed her again could become a knot that would never be taken lightly again.
Then I will give her her blood again and again.
That’s why I love her.
Because it’s different from those unscrupulous people who take their loved ones lightly.
“Don’t think about anything for now, just keep drinking until you feel comfortable.
Oh, and ending with just one drop is unacceptable.”
“Eh, huh?”
This isn’t going to be eye-opening.
How much more servile and miserable are you going to drive yourself into?
“Oh, no, that’s enough for me -“
“Because it doesn’t look like that at all.
You’ve already heard the story, so don’t even think about lying.”
“What kind of story?”
“I heard you hurt yourself. Again.”
Did I not even assume what I knew?
In an instant, tears fill up and your face starts to turn blue.
“I was wrong, you don’t like me like this, do you?
Shedding all the precious blood you gave, making a mess,
“
From noble mtl dot com
Frightened by the sight of her trying to tear off her hair, I threw my whole body at her so that she could not budge.
She seemed very embarrassed when I caught my arms and legs in hers and entangled them, forcing them to cling to me.
“Eh, uh?”
After that, he stroked his back.
Not her speed, so that my body heat can be sure to seep into her.
I could feel her warm body temperature dropping a little, but I hugged her head and –
“Shhh… It’s okay. It’s okay. I’m not trying to scold you.”
As I whispered in his ear and gently comforted him, his panting breath slowly subsided.
“Huh, uhhh… Huh, hah…”
The sounds she used to make were also reduced little by little, and instead, she gave more strength to her arms and hugged me tightly.
It was a bit frustrating, but I liked it.
That’s because you’ll feel each other’s presence clearly.
I did this because I wanted her to clear her head for now and just let her know that I was there,
Fortunately, did I succeed in understanding my feelings?
I smiled a little, but I regained my composure while wiping the flowing tears in my arms.
It was only after watching him regain enough space to breathe comfortably and bury his head in my arms that I was able to slowly open my mouth.
“Please don’t hurt yourself.
Then your pretty skin will all be ruined.
…I will see with my own eyes that your complexion is getting better, so be sure to drink as much as you need.
Do you understand?”
“Yes, I must… I’ll keep this in mind. I won’t hurt myself again…”
As if all her crying had stopped, she lifted her head and reached out her hand to wipe away the rest of her tears as she looked at me.
Then, she licked my wet hand and pampered her.
She slowly picked her up and brought her to her bed, feeling her saliva-stained parts numb.
Leaning on her pillow as her back, facing her, I put her hand to her mouth.
“…Are you ready?”
Passed her finger to her, who signified by her nod,
With the feeling that the skin was slightly cut, the blood began to be sucked out slowly.
And this time, unexpectedly, there was no foreign body feeling at all.
I just watched her gently sucking her finger within her, leaning against her wall in her comfort.
…I hope this puts her at ease.
