11. I’m back!
We’re on our way back to Sacramento, where the state lottery is located.
From nob le mt l. co m
James, Jimmy, Jeffrey, Eric, and now one more person.
It’s my friend George.
After thinking about it for a while, I tell him about winning the Powerball jackpot.
There was no way to explain to him that I, a former South Korean military officer, who had just emailed each other a few years ago to ask how we were doing, was now living in a suite at the Ritz-Carlton in Los Angeles with a $30,000-a-month security detail.
I was too uncomfortable to keep this a secret, especially since I was planning to stay with George when I was in the United States.
Of course, there was also the psychological isolation of George being American.
When I told him that I had won the Powerball jackpot, he jumped up and down and celebrated like it was his job.
He didn’t say anything like, “Can I have a little bit of you?” or anything like that.
Of course, he insisted that I keep it a secret, and I said okay.
“Congratulations, Mr. Kang.”
“Thank you, Mr. Smith.”
The chief of the Lottery, a balding, pot-bellied man, congratulated me and held out an envelope.
“Your settlement is enclosed for your review.”
“Okay.”
I tore open the envelope and found a check and a settlement form.
I checked the amount on the check.
1.249 billion dollars!
I quickly pulled out my smartphone and looked up the exchange rate as of today, June 10, 2015: 1,110.45.
Multiply $1,110.45 by $1.249 billion?
A whopping 1.249 trillion!
Oh! God! Buddha!
What is this?
This piece of paper is worth over a trillion?
I was speechless for a while.
And then it seemed to sink in.
That I had become a SuperRich.
“hahahaha, I’m sorry you’re enjoying this, but I need to give you a little backstory.”
The fat lottery chief interrupted me.
Not letting me enjoy it a bit longer.
“Oh, no, no, please explain.”
“First, Mr. Lecture’s share is 95%, which works out to $2.465 billion for the first prize of $2.4918 billion.”
“Okay, go ahead.”
“Now, since you’ve requested a lump sum payment rather than a 30-year installment, we’ll apply the current lump sum payment rate of 62%, which means $1.498 billion is your share of the prize paid by our Lottery.”
“62%? I thought it was more like 60%?”
“Oh, we usually take 60% for convenience, but it’s not a fixed number, it fluctuates with interest rates. Well, we can take 2% off if you don’t like it, but?”
“No, no, no, you mean I’ll get in trouble?”
You’re joking, of course, but you’re joking about the big day, right?
“hahahahaha! There’s still one more. We don’t take it off, but we do withhold federal taxes, so we’ve withheld 25%. Oh, and as I’m sure you’ve been told, you have until April 15 of next year to file your income tax return and pay another 12%, right?”
“Yes, I was told that.”
“Okay, so we withheld 25% in taxes and that’s your final payment. A whopping $1.249 billion, can you check that?”
Eric held up the settlement statement and studied it for a moment before answering me.
“Alex, that’s correct.”
“Confirmed. It’s correct.”
“Well, would you please sign here?”
Lottery Chief Smith held out a piece of paper, which Jeffrey intercepted and checked carefully.
“Okay, everything is in order, please sign.”
“Yes.”
He calmed his trembling hands and signed.
“hahahahaha! Now you’re all set for payment. Congratulations again!”
“Thank you!”
Now it’s really over.
hahahaha!!!
Well, it wasn’t the end.
“A week? I mean, do you have all these crappy systems?”
“No, that’s the way it is in America, Mr. Kang.”
This is the Citibank branch manager’s office back in LA.
I was told that I would have to present the check back to the bank before the money would be credited.
So, having asked in advance which bank I wanted to use, I chose Citibank, which has branches everywhere in Korea.
I don’t know of any other US banks.
From nob le mt l. co m
James and the others had their own bank, so we split up and went separately.
Of course, Jeffrey and Eric had done the legwork and when we arrived at the bank, the greeter took us straight to the branch manager’s office.
But!
It takes five to seven days after presenting the check for the money to be credited to my account.
How is that possible?
Naturally, when I started freaking out and having a seizure, the branch manager broke out in a cold sweat and said that’s just the way it is in America.
“Jeffrey, are you kidding me? A day for a check from another bank, like in Korea, is one day, but a week, what’s a week?”
“You didn’t know, it takes a week in the U.S. for anything over $5,000. That’s the rule, right?”
“No, how would I know that?”
“Oh! I’m sorry, I guess we all take it for granted and I didn’t tell you. Just give me a minute. I’ll fix it.”
“Huh?”
I thought he was going to break the bank.
But no.
“Manager!”
From nob le mt l. co m
Jeffrey called out to the branch manager, as if he were a different person.
“Yes, Mr. Jean. Go ahead.”
“I’m not going to take it back, this is over $1.1 billion dollars. I’m sure you don’t want to handle it the same as you normally would, do you?”
“No, Mr. Zhang. You know we have procedures, don’t you?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
“What?”
From nob le mt l. co m
Jeffrey’s eyes narrowed a little more.
“Who do you think I am?”
“No—.”
“Well, today is Wednesday, June 10, and I’ll give you until 12:00 noon on June 12, when I’m sure you’ll be too busy to think about it.”
“No Mr.—.”
“If not, say so now. I’ll go to another bank and tell my supervisor at headquarters that you’re going to take all my clients’ accounts.”
“No, you won’t, you won’t!”
Wow, America, you’re more dynamic than I thought, huh?
Also, Jeffrey was more of a big shot than I thought.
“If you’d just said that, how much better we’d be for each other.”
“I apologize.”
“Well, then, I’ll leave you with that, and you’ll come to the Ritz-Carlton by twelve o’clock on Friday to explain it to Mr. Kang. Okay?”
“Yes, sir.”
From nob le mt l. co m
Jeffrey turned his head to face me again and asked.
“Can you do it on Friday?”
“That would be great, right?”
“Okay, then let’s go!”
“Yay!”
In the car back to the hotel.
“I mean, what is it about America that’s so slow and complicated? What kind of world is this where they don’t give you a check for your winnings and it doesn’t hit your bank account until a week after you present it?”
“Alex.”
“Yes, Jeffrey.”
“Let’s get this straight. It’s not that America is slow, it’s that Korea is fast.”
“Is that right?”
“Yep. But there’s something wrong with that branch manager.”
“Why? I thought he was doing it on principle.”
“Well, a rule is a rule, and with rules come exceptions, and we weren’t asking for anything unethical. We were asking for fair treatment for a VVIP.”
Does that make sense?
“It’s over $1.1 billion dollars. A hundred million dollars is a lot of money to chew on principles, but 1.1 billion dollars! And this asshole in charge of the branch kept talking about principles. He doesn’t deserve to be in that position.”
“Yeah? What are you going to do?”
“What am I going to do? I’m going to talk to my supervisor and see if I can get him fired or transferred.”
“Oh, come on, with what? I’m fine.”
“I’m not okay?”
“What?”
“Actually, I’m more offended, because you dared to slap this Jeffrey Zhang in the face, and you’ve been doing it since the beginning. You send your employee down without coming out yourself?”
“…”
“That branch manager, he only came in two months ago. If he was like the old one, he would have been waiting for us outside even if there was a typhoon. Procedure? Honestly, this is my mistake, I thought he was the old manager and he’d take care of it. If I leave him alone, my customers will leave. Seeing what he’s doing, he wouldn’t have done it today.”
“I see.”
“Yeah, that’s what it is.”
It was pretty scary to see Jeffrey get angry.
Especially since he had the ability to follow through on what he said in his anger.
On Friday morning, Jeffrey came in early, and while we were flirting, the Citibank branch manager came in.
And, finally, my first-place winnings were deposited into my account.
A credit card with an unlimited limit came as an addendum.
“George.”
“Why, Alex?”
“I’m going to Korea next week, what do you want to do?”
“What am I supposed to do, come back?”
“What happens when I come back?”
“I can’t tease you with a paycheck, can I? You have to work, right?”
“Security again?”
“How should I know? You’ve made my life easier for a while now, so I’ll do whatever you tell me to do. But I’ve been doing a lot of bodyguarding, so I might be going to war this time. I prefer it that way, and bodyguarding is a kind of emotional labor.”
“Hmmm—.”
Now that I’ve won the first prize, I have to go to Korea and take care of my family.
Of course, I’ll be back in the States as soon as I can.
But there’s a catch.
When I get back to the States in a couple of months, I’ll either have to ask for another assignment, or I’ll have to let him go and keep him with me, but I don’t want him to go off to war in the meantime.
Besides, mercenary jobs are supposed to last at least six months.
And if you’re unlucky, you could be killed by a blind bullet or an IED (Improvised Explosive Device).
From nob le mt l. co m
Just like Juan did.
Whatever I did, I was going to be in the U.S. for a while, and I needed George.
He was good, but he was also the most trustworthy.
No matter how much money I had, I didn’t want to leave my back to a stranger.
If only I hadn’t known he existed in the first place.
“You, quit your job and come to me. I’ll take care of you.”
“Really?”
“Then are you lying?”
“Do you really need me or what? I’m not going to turn you into an army brat just because you made a fortune.”
“You bastard, don’t you think I should have at least one guy in America I can trust?”
“If that’s the case, well, I’m a dick. Hmph!”
“I’ll tell Jeffrey, and you need to get yourself a place. You can’t stay in a hotel forever, can you?”
“Okay.”
“Don’t be too fancy, but since you know L.A. so well, pick somewhere scenic and safe, and keep the budget under $20 million.”
“Okay.”
“And when I get back, I’ll leave the security to your company, so why don’t you ask them to put together a team of ex-Green Berets?”
“What, you don’t like Navy SEALs?”
“Well, let’s be honest, you guys specialize in going in and kicking ass, and how many Green Berets does Kyung Ho have?”
“Hmph, I’ll give you that!”
“f*ck you.”
The day before I flew back to Korea.
I met Jeffrey at the hotel bar.
“When are you coming back?”
“I’ll be back in two months if I can, but it might be a little longer, it’s not like I’ve been doing anything crazy here.”
“Well, you’re Super Rich now, so have fun. Oh, and I sent you an email on my way out of the office, so you should see it.”
“What’s that?”
“I put in some contacts for people who might be able to help you in Korea, Alex, the guy Jeffrey introduced you to. I’ve already talked to her.”
“Oh! You have connections in Korea?”
“About 20% of my clients are wealthy Koreans, so I make sure to go there a couple times a year.”
“Hya? He’s a very powerful man?”
“Crazy!”
“Hmph!”
“Hmph!”
After laughing conspiratorially together, I held out a small box.
“What is this? Surely it’s not an engagement ring?”
“Oh, really? Open it.”
Click!
“Hmm? A watch? A Patek Philippe Aquanaut?”
“Do you like it?”
“Did James tell you that I have a hobby of collecting watches?”
“Yeah, and he said you like to be in the water, so I thought I’d get you something we could both be happy with.”
“What’s water play? Water play? Sailing and diving?”
“What is that?”
“Hmph, you’re crazy. I’m glad you did. This must have been hard to get.”
“Well, I paid the hotel manager a generous commission, and he brought it to me two days after I fell in love with it.”
“Heh! Look at you, you’ve already realized the ways of SuperRich, even though no one taught you?”
“Fuhahahahaha!”
“hahahahaha!”
From nob le mt l. co m
June 24.
After two and a half months, I returned home to Incheon Airport.
I took a taxi straight to my home in Eunpyeong-gu.
“I’m home!”
