120. A harsh winter day
[Episode 120] – A harsh winter day
A month has passed since Titania’s seclusion ended. The seasons also went by, with spring ending and summer coming, to the point where it felt muggy in her room unless she opened the window.
The royal palace began to buzz as if it had regained its vitality. After crying profusely, Titania continued her classes with her ministers to receive an education to become her future queen, and she began to focus on her studies.
And Veronica and Ainsel-
“…Where on earth did you go? “I don’t see any traces at all?”
-I can’t feel Vivien’s magic at all. First of all, I’m sure there aren’t any around the capital. Vivian’s magical power is a bit unique, so I thought I would find it quickly…
In order to keep his promise to Titania, he was busy looking for Vivian, who had left the castle. Even with the help of the dwarves in the hut, they could not find it even though Ainsel had turned the entire capital’s mirrors into powder.
As if someone was intentionally hiding Vivian.
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“It’s been three months since Vivian left the castle… No, you said it’s been four months now, right? So maybe he went to another country? Why… Vivian here is the type of person who does it for sure if she says something, right? “If he had decided to go to another country to be separated from Titania…”
-…I can’t say no.
Veronica and Ainsel sighed at the same time.
Even though a lot of time had passed since Vivian left the royal castle, he never thought that there would be no trace of her. Veronica, who thought she would at least find out where she lived, was in real trouble. Lately, Titania’s eyes have been unusual as she asks, ‘Are we there yet?’
“…Did I really never tell you where I was going?”
-I kept saying it, but there isn’t one. He never said where he was going or where he was going. I just thought Vivian had no idea…
“It’s poignant…”
Veronica burst into laughter at Ainsel’s harsh tone of calling Vivian stupid. Veronica stretched out her arms high in the air as all she could do was sigh. I thought that if things continued like this, Titania’s patience would reach its limit.
At that moment, a knock was heard on the door, and Titania entered the room. She was doing a little better than when she had been secluded in her room, but she still looked haggard, as if the studies she had started after deciding to become queen were difficult. It was natural that I was haggard after being shot by ministers every day.
Entering her room, Titania let out a sigh, then placed her books and papers on her desk and looked at Veronica and Eincel. Titania’s lips pursed as she seemed to have something she wanted to say, but she just sighed again, and Titania held back and brought up another topic.
“Sister, my grandmother called me, so I’ll come back.”
“…Okay, come back.”
Seeing Titania leaving the room with her sagging appearance, Veronica and Ain Sel began searching for Vivian once again. Targeting the next city, Ainsel searches the surrounding area through the mirror. Veronica began searching for Vivian with the help of her dwarves.
*
“Grandma, did you call me?”
“Okay. “Come closer, Titania.”
Entering the room, Titania walked gently and approached the Queen Mother, who was sitting astride the head of her bed. Even though she came every day, she felt that the room was becoming more desolate with each passing day.
Titania smiled bitterly at the sight of her grandmother losing her physical strength day by day. It was only the day after her seclusion ended that Titania noticed that her queen mother was ill.
Unable to bear it, Vinchot finally told Titania about the Queen Mother’s health condition, which he had kept hidden until now, and as soon as Titania found out, her face blushed at the foolishness he had caused her.
With her mother gone and her grandmother sick, Titania thought it was not the time for her to be foolish. She said she had to focus on her grandmother for now, and Titania tried to forget about Vivian.
‘If my grandmother leaves me now…’
Titania shook her head to shake off her bad thoughts, and she smiled and stroked her queen’s bony knuckles. She said, ‘I don’t want to be separated now.’ ‘I don’t want anyone to go away from my side.’ With those feelings in mind, Titania gently squeezed the Queen Mother’s hand.
The Queen Mother, looking at Titania holding her hand tightly, let out a small sigh and continued her words.
“Titania. “Do you hate Vivian very much?”
“…Well, I don’t know.”
When asked if she hated her mother, Titania did not know how to answer. I hated her mother. Really, she hated her mother for leaving her without a word and just a letter. I really hated her to death.
But, despite that, she was confident that she loved her mother. She was confident that she wanted to see her mother, that she wanted to touch her mother, and that she wanted to meet her mother. If even that was greedy, she would have just stayed by her side.
“…Don’t hate me too much. That child just kept his promise to me. “Do you know how mean she was to Vivian when she said she didn’t want to leave your side?”
“…What did you say?”
“They say she would give up everything, including being queen, if she could just be your mother. No matter how ugly she looked… Really, she was so servile that I couldn’t believe it came out of Vivian’s mouth.”
Titania widened her eyes at the sight of the Queen Mother smiling and talking.
Because her mother had never told her such a story. But, if she cared so much for her, why did she leave without saying anything? If only she had at least told the story…
“…That kid is more servile than I thought. Should I say he has no self-esteem or should I say he lacks confidence. “She was closer to a commoner than a queen of a country.”
Titania smiled at the story that seemed like she knew something. Certainly, unlike other nobles who had high self-esteem, my mother was timid and simple. Her appearance was like a small animal.
“The only time that such a petty citizen looked like a queen was when she was for you.”
“…When it’s for me…?”
“Yes, for you, her daughter. At those times, she turned into a strong and dignified person as if she had never been like that before. “She may stumble sometimes, but she is always a ‘mother’ figure when she thinks of you.”
Even I couldn’t show it to my child.
The Queen Mother smiled bitterly and spoke in a whisper. She then lifted her bony arm, and she stroked Titania’s face. As her scratchy palm touched her face, Titania’s eyes watered due to her overwhelmed emotions.
“So, please think that the reason Vivian left you was ‘for you.’ Everything bad is me. They couldn’t find even the slightest compromise and were just busy kicking Vivian out. Honestly, I regret it. Was there really no other way? Should I have been unreasonable to the ministers? “I have such regrets.”
“Oh, no. Really…”
Titania lowered her head and could not raise it. Feeling as if she would burst into tears again if this continued, Titania forced a smile and looked at her queen mother.
“Well, more than that, please tell me about her old mother. “I want to hear how humble she was that her grandmother said that.”
“hehehe, yes. Let me tell you. So, that time…”
So slowly, Titania and her queen consort talked. Just like her granddaughter and grandmother, she blossomed with stories that had never been told before. From the story of Vivian that Titania doesn’t know, to the story of Titania’s academy. And, she constantly talked about her grandmother’s childhood.
“…It’s a bit difficult.”
How long has it been like that? We had been talking without even realizing that the sun was setting, so the Queen Mother let out a long sigh and leaned back on her bed. Titania became restless at the sight of her grandmother, who already looked tired, and slowly supported her queen.
“… Shall I call her maid?”
“…No, I think I need to rest a little.”
The Queen Mother, who must have been very tired, closed her eyelashes neatly and whispered softly. Titania supported the Queen Mother and slowly laid her on the bed. Then, she arranged her pillows and cushions and placed her Queen Mother on her bed.
The Queen Mother’s bony bones and her dry skin touching her fingertips every time she supported her made Titania feel various emotions. She hated herself for being so rude to her grandmother, who was not surprised if she collapsed at any moment.
The Queen Mother lay on her bed, letting out her exhausted breath and catching her breath. Just as Titania was about to get up from her seat so as not to disturb her grandmother’s rest, the Queen Mother placed her hand on the back of Titania’s hand.
“…Titania.”
“Yes…Grandma.”
Soon after, the Queen Mother closed her eyes and spoke in a voice so quiet that it almost sounded like she was talking to herself.
“…If it goes as promised, the day will come when we can meet again soon.”
“Yes…? “What is that…”
“…I’m tired. “I need to get some rest.”
The Queen Mother did not say anything more. She quietly closed her eyes, breathing evenly as she fell asleep. What does it mean that the day to meet her grandmother has come? Titania tilted her head as if she had no idea, but the Queen Mother did not answer.
After confirming that the Queen Mother was asleep in her bed, Titania stood up and smiled brightly as she looked at the Queen Mother lying on her bed. Please, I hope her grandmother lives a long, long life. I desperately hoped that she would get better quickly, and I put my hands together and made a wish.
“…Good night, Grandma.”
*
Time passes and passes again.
Across the seasons, a harsh winter day.
The time when Titania woke up from her sweet sleep.
The news that her maid rushed to deliver once again broke down the pillars that supported her Titania. Feeling as if her heart was falling to the floor, Titania got up and ran to where her maid was leading her.
It was truly a sudden incident. Her grandmother, who had greeted her with a normal smile until yesterday, suddenly passed away without any sign. Really, suddenly.
Titania managed to walk on her trembling legs, but halfway through, her legs gave out and she collapsed down the hallway. The maid somehow took Titania to where her queen was sleeping.
At the Queen Mother’s deathbed, Bangchot and her ministers who came first were sobbing and shedding tears. The atmosphere seemed to indicate that all of this was true, and Titania shed tears once again.
Titania, supported by her maid, slowly approached the spot where her queen was lying.
Her grandmother had already passed away, but her face was so peaceful that it was hard to believe that her grandmother was dead, as if she was just sleeping. Really, she looked like she was about to open her eyes at any moment.
Her grandmother was closing her eyes and she was smiling a little. It was as if she comforted those she left behind rather than her own sorrow at her departure. It was a warm smile that seemed to comfort everyone who stayed here.
Once again, Titania shed tears over the death of her family. She wanted to collapse on the floor and sob in tears, but that was not polite to her grandmother, who smiled at her until the end.
Titania took hold of her grandmother’s cold hand with her trembling hand and brought it to her lips and offered her prayer. She prayed as her farewell message, saying that she was truly happy to be born as her grandmother’s granddaughter.
After her prayer was over, Vinchot called Titania.
“Princess…”
“…Ah.”
Titania put down her queen’s hand and turned her head to look around her.
The colors of the people around me felt like cold gray. The eyes of those around her looking at her felt like a cold snowstorm pouring down from a gray sky on a harsh winter day.
Titania felt something that she had vaguely felt since she was a child touch her heart. She knew this day would come someday, but when it came, she couldn’t be more scared.
I see.
There is no one here to call ‘family’ to support you anymore.
Her grandmother and her mother, who were always by her side, are no longer here.
Vinchot, who was wiping away her tears, said in a hoarse voice that he would prepare her funeral. Titania raised her head and looked out her window. It was a terrible winter with continuous snowstorms and no sun.
The sky, colored a dark and cloudy dark gray, was busy scattering pure white snowstorms without stopping. The sound of the wind coming through the window was like the sound of a woman sobbing.
Titania felt that the voice sounded like her own sobbing. Mourning the death of her grandmother, she cried like a banshee, pitying herself for being left alone.
