75 – Can’t run away (1)
Song Su-yeon couldn’t breathe.
“…Did you have a good pictorial…?”
I couldn’t give any answer to Jeong-gyeom’s question.
Jeong-gyeom was the reason she lived. Without him, I would have already left this world.
He was the first person in my life to tell me the warmth of a person, and he was the one who taught me love.
There were times when he was like a gourmand, stupid, and mean-spirited person, but he was also a person who had the confidence of a straight pillar on the inside.
He was shaking and crying.
It was clear that it wasn’t the usual tears.
I tried to hold it in, but the tears came out without realizing it.
It was evident through the trembling of the whole body.
It was the first time I saw him.
And the one who gave these feelings as a gift was none other than himself.
It was so painful that it was unbearable to stab a dagger at the most important person.
Song Soo-yeon felt the tearing pain.
I had to check what I had broken with my own hands.
The store that could be called home is gone.
He took Jeong-gyeom’s treasure.
I already knew how he ran this store.
I saw her smiling as she wiped the spot she had cleaned.
I also knew the cute fact that sometimes he secretly talks to this store.
So, the recoil was great.
A single tear falls from Song Soo-yeon’s pupils, which have widened from the shock.
“…hahahaha…”
I can’t really breathe
What have you done?
“…Did you have a good time…?”
he asked again.
Song Soo-yeon, who was unable to come to her senses from the shock, also knew.
that I have to answer
“..well…they did a good job filming. But… the store…”
What would he say if he found out that it was the alliance of villains she belonged to that ruined this store?
Wouldn’t he, who was so kind, turn coldly?
Wouldn’t you say you don’t want to see it again and ask it to go away?
“…hahahaha…”
Just imagining it made me feel like the world was collapsing.
Song Soo-yeon hugged Jeong-gyeom without realizing it.
– Knock!
And clenched his clothes in two fists.
The more you fantasize about him pushing you away, the more you hug him.
Jeong-gyeom also nodded at Song Soo-yeon’s answer, then wrapped his arms behind her and hugged her.
The two people comforted each other after losing a space with memories called a store.
However, Soo-yeon Song, who was comforted, felt guilty. She knew very well that she was the culprit of all this.
The primary cause is Trino, but this plan itself was started because of Song Soo-yeon.
I knew I didn’t deserve to cry.
But the tears keep coming out.
How disgusting would Jeong-gyeom be if he found out all the facts.
Jung-gyeom raised his head and looked at Song Soo-yeon.
Ironically, he smiles with difficulty as he sees Song Soo-yeon’s tears.
He still comforts her with his trustworthy charm.
After calming down, he finally began to soothe Song Soo-yeon.
As emotions run rampant, rational lines crumble.
Jeong-gyeom brushed Song Soo-yeon’s hair as if he were an old lover while holding her in his arms.
wipes away tears
Run through your hair a couple of times, lightly pinch your cheeks.
he said in a hushed voice.
“…Shall we go to eat?”
A voice that seemed to hide the pain.
But the more she saw him, the more Song Soo-yeon’s heart ached.
****
I arrived at the first soup restaurant I came to after returning and continued to eat with Song Soo-yeon.
It was awkward.
Feeding Song Soo-yeon food from other restaurants, not mine.
To eat without cooking.
Song Soo-yeon was still staring blankly at the rice soup placed right in front of her, as if she hadn’t escaped the shock of the shop being destroyed.
It was a bonus to shudder at the irregular breathing caused by tears.
Seeing her like that made me feel more comfortable trusting her.
…Of course, grieving over the broken store and the odds of her becoming Luna are two completely different things…but the doubt is allayed a little.
No, maybe he doesn’t want to be suspicious.
Maybe she doesn’t want to believe that she’s a villain.
Maybe he’s desperately rolling his eyes.
Yes, a lot has changed from before returning to the first place… Even so, I wonder if I am rotten who doubts Song Soo-yeon?
Wouldn’t it be that I believe in my experiences too much just because I regressed?
anyway. Even if it is forced, it removes the mind that doubts Song Soo-yeon.
I passed the warm rice down my throat to soothe my heart.
“…Soo-yeon, eat.”
And wakes up the hardened Song Soo-yeon.
“…ah.”
She blinked and raised her head.
Tears flow again from the eyes of the girl who found me.
She is cold and harsh… but she has a warm personality inside.
Seeing you so sad
I reached out and wiped her tears.
And smile and say
“…Eat quickly. It will cool down.”
Song Soo-yeon nodded slowly and began to fill her stomach.
.
.
.
Some empty bowls.
The dinner that followed in silence was coming to an end.
It fills the stomach and calms the mind.
Now I had to make plans for the future.
“…Mister, what are you going to do?”
Song Soo-yeon asked.
“…what?”
I also ask the hard way.
She frowned again and said.
“…Shop, what are you going to do?”
I awkwardly touched my neck.
It’s embarrassing to admit, but it had to be told.
“…actually, I don’t have insurance…so I don’t have any money.”
“…yes?”
“…Even if the building owner does the repairs…the money will still be insufficient. I have to close my business, can I do anything?”
The tableware falls from Song Soo-yeon’s hand.
– Clink!
Her eyes blink anxiously, and her hands shake again.
“…closed…closed?”
I smiled, hoping she wouldn’t cry any more.
“…are you okay.”
Of course, it wasn’t okay.
Now, the link between me and Song Soo-yeon will fade.
I usually met her at a place called a store… but now there’s no such thing.
Well, it might be possible to eat or play once in a while, but there wouldn’t be a regular meeting.
I hate to let this shop go…but I guess I’ll have to look for the next step too.
Okay.
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Good deeds will continue into the future.
Is it the fact that I don’t have to take care of her anymore?
I decided to be satisfied with the fact that I helped one person, Song Soo-yeon.
Originally, it was me who asked her to find another part-time job when she became an adult.
Now that she is building a career as a model… From her point of view, there is no timing like this.
“…Poetry…I don’t like it…!”
Song Soo-yeon jumps up and shouts.
Her eyes were quivering anxiously.
“…Calm down and sit down, Soo-yeon.”
Despite my words, Song Soo-yeon turned around the table and sat down next to me.
Then, holding my arms with both hands, I speak in a desperate voice.
“No…! No…! Uncle… yes?”
As if in a swarm, she waved at me and begged me.
It hurts, but that doesn’t mean there’s no way out.
“…My heart is like a chimney, too. but you said I have no money.”
“Even if it’s money, I’ll provide it.”
“……..what?”
Song Soo-yeon’s hand slips and grabs my hand.
In an instant, she clenched her pods tightly and begged again.
“If it’s money, I’ll give it to you…Don’t close your business, okay?”
It’s the first time I’ve seen her so earnest.
It’s the complete opposite of the harsh first impression.
It is said that she, too, does not want the store to disappear.
“Where is your money?”
But I asked a practical question.
“I mean it will cost more than you expected. Even if you can’t do it, it costs tens of thousands of won.”
Song Soo-yeon answered without hesitation.
“I will give it to you.”
“….what?”
“Mo, I made a lot of money working as a model… I’ll provide the money… It’s our store…”
“……”
I stared blankly at her.
The closed box of doubt is reopened.
“……You said you’ve already saved up tens of millions of won from your modeling job?”
Even a fool knows that she is pretty. But it’s been less than a month since I started.
Is it possible to earn that much?
Song Soo-yeon averted her eyes and spoke tremblingly.
“…..Ah, I haven’t collected all of them yet…I think I will be able to collect them…so…don’t think about money…right?”
On the day when I was losing doubt, Song Soo-yeon hugged me.
put both arms around my neck
Again she weeps bitterly.
“Please…yes? please…”
Like her, I become desperate in an instant.
I hope she doesn’t become a villain.
Please, hope it’s an illusion created by my rubbish delusion.
“…you don’t have to give me a chance to repay the favor…”
Her tears wet my throat.
In this situation, you can definitely feel the depth of affection again.
I realize that she valued me and the store so much.
I want to believe. I will believe
Put your doubts aside again.
Eventually, I slowly nodded.
“First…give me time to think. Not yet…”
At my answer, Song Soo-yeon hugged me tighter. The shaking of the body becomes stronger.
I let out a long sigh.
…for the first time taking direct damage from a villain.
I never thought I would feel this much anger and loss.
Maybe I’m being punished.
It’s about everything you’ve done before.
I whispered.
“…..I hate villains so much.”
“…….”
It was a bit of self-loathing.
“…I hate it so much.”
Also, this is what I want Song Soo-yeon to hear.
I hoped that my hatred would not apply to her.
****
Song Soo-yeon hated heroes.
When I was young, when I was desperate, when I stretched out my hand to ask for help, it was because I had memories of being turned away.
Just as flaws can only be seen once they are seen, hostility towards heroes has accumulated every time an article about hypocritical heroes is published.
……. But now I know.
Why do people love heroes and hate villains?
No, more than that, why do you hate villains?
I know from experience. When the most precious space is destroyed and the heart that had affection for that space is also crushed, there is no choice but to know.
If there was something a little different, no one could blame Song Soo-yeon.
Because the villain was himself.
And as a villain, you can clearly see the impact of your actions.
In the process, I was able to look straight at the suffering of my loved one with both eyes open, and I had to endure the guilt.
“…”
Song Soo-yeon silently filled Jeong-gyeom’s glass.
In Jeong-gyeom’s studio, I sit next to him and politely fill my glass with both arms.
Jung-gyeom smiled and tousled Song Soo-yeon’s hair.
“…no. Of course not.”
Talking to himself incomprehensibly, he gradually got drunk.
Six bottles of soju had already passed. He has already drunk five bottles.
He asked for my understanding, saying that I would have a little drink today.
Of course, Song Soo-yeon did not throw up. It’s harmful to health, but I couldn’t help but hope that it would comfort my mind.
However, the more he broke the glass, the more Song Soo-yeon’s heart burned.
The empty bottles were like proof of how hard he was, and his heart kept pounding.
It was the first time he had seen him like this.
Song Soo-yeon secretly wiped away her tears.
“…it can’t be. It can’t be.”
Jeonggyeom continued to smile and said.
I knew that he was drunk, but Song Soo-yeon finally asked.
“What do you keep saying it’s not…?”
“…….”
he didn’t answer He just smiles more kindly and pinches Song Soo-yeon’s cheek.
Does he know that whenever he touches me like this, I am overcome with a great sense of guilt and the urge to hug him.
I feel so guilty that I want to give my whole body.
Jeong-gyeom broke the glass and looked up.
His eyes reach his fake pictorial.
He smiles again and says.
“…pretty. really pretty.”
“…”
“okay. Are you a model?”
“…”
“…I have no choice but to make a lot of money. So…because it’s pretty…”
“…”
Song Soo-yeon did not ask him any more questions.
It is only now that I realize for the first time that everything becomes cautious in the presence of someone who is so heartbroken.
Also, as much as there were mistakes, there were also hardened accidents.
Song Soo-yeon was just beside him… like a gisaeng, filling his glass.
Jeonggyeom let out a long sigh.
And he blinks… and soon his body relaxes.
– Clink!
I lose my glass, and my head loses strength.
Soon he breathes heavily and falls asleep.
Song Soo-yeon stared blankly at it.
The image of him drinking a lot of alcohol, heartbroken.
The way he kept rolling his eyes.
In the end, he gets drunk and falls asleep.
As he sleeps… her feelings for not having the right to cry intensify.
The heart that was suppressed by guilt bursts out.
Tears flowed.
“Ugh…! oops…”
he is so sad It hurts so much.
I can’t believe this is what he did.
All I can give him back is happiness.
There is a mountain of grace to repay. What the hell were you supposed to do?
However, Song Soo-yeon did not cry for long.
She gently wipes away the tears with her forearm, takes a mop from the bathroom, and wipes the wet floor with soju.
And with difficulty, he helped Jeong-gyeom and laid him down on the bed right next to him.
“…”
Song Soo-yeon looks at the drunken man.
I hated myself for being complex.
Even though I am overflowing with apologetic feelings and guilt… a handful of desire intervenes.
The person he loved was lying defenseless… In a way, it was unavoidable.
But she shook her head.
Now was not the time for such fantasies.
and make a decision
Quit the villain.
The store was destroyed in an accidental accident… but it doesn’t seem to work anymore.
It is unlikely that accidents like this will happen again in the future.
Even if he made a shocking amount of money and achieved a little bit of his goal of hurting Solas… this one experience was enough to be traumatic.
….In addition to that, Jeong-gyeom’s hatred for the villain grows day by day.
The chances are slim, but if the day comes that he gets caught…
Just imagining it made Song Soo-yeon afraid and going crazy.
The moment she was caught by him, she knew that her relationship with him… was over.
She didn’t even make it to the villain rankings.
It seemed that Stella had decided to hide herself from the Hero Association.
So now is the time to step out.
When awareness is low, let’s end it.
Song Soo-yeon calms down next to Jeong-gyeom lying on the bed.
I hold his hand tightly and look at his face.
“…”
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Go back home…Let’s call Stella.
As much as we know it’s not going to be easy, let’s use that as an excuse to say we’re disappointed that we didn’t completely destroy Solas. Then you will be able to leave a little easier.
leaving like that-
“…Las.”
Momentarily, Jung-gyeom’s drowsy talk paralyzes Song Soo-yeon’s reason.
“…Solas…S. Sorry.”
His voice resonates in the silent studio.
Tears flowed from his eyes. His expression crumpled as if he was having a nightmare.
The vitality disappears from Song Soo-yeon’s eyes.
“…Solas…I’m sorry…”
why even now
Why do I still think of Solas when I’m drunk?
Why do you think of that double year?
It wasn’t him… he was with him.
…Even in this situation, the jealous person himself was disgusting.
Inappropriately, possessiveness overflows.
“…mister.”
Song Soo-yeon whispers.
And finally muster up the courage.
It wasn’t until after he got drunk and fell asleep.
Even in a dream, after calling Solas, he mustered up his jealousy.
“…if you look at me…if only I…look at you…”
Song Soo-yeon climbed up his upper body.
His body odor, which he always loved, is thicker than ever.
face came closer.
“…If I do… then… I don’t need to do this… I don’t have to… do bad things…”
Song Soo-yeon closed her eyes to calm herself down.
There were hundreds of things I could imagine in my head.
…but it shouldn’t be like this.
make up your mind again
this is a crime
At a distance where their noses almost touch each other, she opens her eyes again and looks at Jeong-gyeom with lustful eyes.
And with extreme patience… I began to pull myself back.
It shouldn’t be like this.
“…brush-“
“-heep…”
But the moment Solas’ name came out of his mouth again, he couldn’t stand it any longer.
He put his lips on Jeonggyeom’s lips.
From his mouth, prevent names other than himself from coming out.
I couldn’t bear to see a name other than ‘Soo Yeon-ah’ come out.
She knew too.
this is sexual harassment
no, it’s rape
It was one of the acts that Song Soo-yeon was disgusted with just by imagining it.
Still, I can’t afford to worry.
Defeated by the urge, my body moved first.
She steals his lips like a villain.
I had to feel guilty.
Even if I thought about what I had done today, I would never be able to pay for my sins in the rest of my life.
But she didn’t feel… guilty for this moment.
Rather, the kiss gave her the deepest pleasure she had ever experienced.
It was she who realized that she was becoming a really terrible villain.
